I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
Why did you come into my room last night at 3am and pour monopoly money on me while you were crying?
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
i just remembered i drunk watched the brave little toaster last night
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