I went to blockbuster, where I always go when I need to soul searching
Despondent, hopeless, I decide on vantage point, because I vaguely resemble matthew fox (let me believe this, please)
It was cheaper to buy then rent, so now I'm stuck w/ a wretched hangover and I own this shit movie
Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up to somebody tossing my salad... I should have drank more
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
Do you have feelings for this penis?
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
Randomize