help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
You are writing your college essay comparing yourself to Lady Gaga, Vladimir Putin, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. and you are worried about the conclusion sounding cheesy?
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
I snapchatted him 4 pictures of me as Tarzan's dad so if he never talks to me again at least we'll know why
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
Randomize
