but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
Sorry about blasting sandstorm on a loop when i left for work this morning. But maybe this will teach you to not come home trashed on a tuesday night with some chick and have loud sex till 4 in the morning. The walls are thin, remember?
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
They wont sell alcohol here on election day! HOW THE FUCK DO THEY EXPECT ME TO ENJOY THE ELECTION SOBER?
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
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