Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
Also, my old intern Lizzie whom you fed pizza to last night wants to hang out with you
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
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