Sometimes, when I'm driving alone I talk to myself in a Russian accent so I think it's my mommy and it calms me down.
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
that is very illegal...i love you.
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