Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
was stoked on phone sex until he started reciting lines from star wars
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
21 Porn Stars Confess What Sex Is Really Like On Set
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
i had to take my roommates dildo out of her suitcase so I could use it
the suitcase or the dildo?
I like to melt taper candles in my wine bottles the next day, it makes my drinking trophies more classy, and makes me look like less of an alcoholic.
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
19 People That Found Pubes In All The Wrong Places
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.