I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
Just 30 Funny Tumblr Posts About Starbucks
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
18 People Are Kind Of A**holes But Also Completely Hilarious
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
I am on my way right now and I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU EAT MY BURRITO YOU WILL NEVER SEE MY TITS AGAIN
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.