Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
So apparently vaginal secretions are not covered under water damage insurance for my cell phone
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
Randomize
