She went to the bathroom before i broke up with her so i changed all 2500 of her songs on her computer to "I'm a cheating whore"
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
If you happen to tell anybody my drunk story in the near future, please refrain from telling them about me shitting myself. People are getting the wrong idea and random people are messaging me on Facebook making fun of me for that
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
Randomize
