Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
Going to the eye doctors drunk makes you feel like your doing a sobriety test! They have to know..
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