I can't sleep so instead I'm thinking of all the things I would love to do to you right now
That's weird, I usually just count sheep
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
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So I'm pretty sure I fucked the dept of homeland security guy on my kitchen table. No recollection of it, but there are signs.
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
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He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
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