the guy I was hooking up with asked me if he could wear a guerilla suit during sex.
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
Dude. Steinbecking. It's when you double-fist coffee and alcohol to help you meet a writing deadline.
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
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