I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
I can't believe I just compared my penis to a St. Bernard.
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
I have peed in a lot of sinks
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
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