16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
Randomize
