How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
There's a difference tho. *I* drink at seven in the morning because I work graveyards. YOU drink at seven in the morning cause you're an alcoholic.
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