just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
ALso, saw an adorable man walking an adorable dog with his adorable kid.
And yes, that last sentence is biased because my ovaries started screaming
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
my mom asked me why i was covered in scratches, blood, and dirt this morning..i answered "i was planking obviously" and walked away
Randomize
