did you hook up at the wedding?
No but I jerked off on the hotel sheets. I wanted to get my moneys worth.
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
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