Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
He texted me saying that his mom found my nuva ring in their jacuzzi filter. I don't think I'm welcome back anytime soon.
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
Is "sorry I booted you out mid-fuck last night" a good icebreaker?
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
Randomize
