are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
There is a goat eating lettuce out of our fridge. Do you wanna grab a bloody mary?
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