he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
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