So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
My early Valentine's Day one night stand just took an uber home. Thank you, technology, for letting me enjoy this day in peace. 😍
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
Randomize