It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
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