so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
then my best friend's brother, boyfriend, and future bro in law showed up at the bar. they asked who i was there with. didn't know if "a 40 year old man" or "my 5th grade teacher" was better answer.
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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