Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
Dude in the stall next to me shitting and sobbing. Dude another stall over, "Come on bro, you gotta loosen up." This is why I don't shit in public.
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
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