is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
i need some magic done to my vagina
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
Randomize