He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
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