ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
the cop didnt laugh with me when he patted me down and pulled out my flask.
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
Next time she asks for a ride to her "cousins" house and it turns out to be a booty call we're charging her for each mile.
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
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