That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
Oh my god. I slept with my boyfriend last night. It was wonderful.
And when I say my boyfriend I mean my electric blanket. Because that's the kind of life I lead.
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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