you know you're not getting laid when you start breaking awkward silences with quotes from Robot Chicken
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
Randomize
