Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
I woke up on the couch screaming in pain. I don't know how ended up there or why my foot was double the size. all I know is I'm now in a cast and never drinking tequila again. worst hangover ever.
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