Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
You installed a beer holder in the shower?! You're the best roommate ever!
... That's a shower caddy.
I believe this is a toe-mate-toe vs. toe-maut-toe situation.
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
Randomize
