u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
you would pick up someone in the library
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
A man pulled out his penis last night and when I said I wouldn't touch it, he said, "that's fine it just needs to breathe".
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
Randomize