you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
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I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
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We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
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I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
There is a huge fucking spider in my bathroom....I can just burn our apartment down right? What do you need me to grab?
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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