i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
I mistook a propane tank for a keg.
Apparently I was so drunk I threw my entire wallet at the stripper on stage. That was the third time I should've gotten kicked out.
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
Randomize
