question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
I drove 5 hours to see her. She thanked me by getting shitfaced, inviting her boyfriend over, and making me sleep on the couch after I cooked for them and did the dishes. You're right. I'm a fucking doormat.
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
Just high enough for therapy.
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
Randomize
