You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
my grand plan for the evening is to do shots of vodka til i cant anymore
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
Sex on the scooter in the parking lot wasn't the smartest idea. Actual quote from the cop as he handed me the ticket and fist bumped me.
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
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