I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
no you cant smoke seaweed
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
This will be the 3rd time you have blacked out and lost your phone only to have some kind stranger find it, charge it, call me, then mail it back to you. Your luck amazes me...
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
I'm always down for nudity.
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
Randomize