I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
Why did u text me "I want to get drunk and go to pizza hut tomorrow. don't let me forget." at 3am??
That text was pretty fucking self-explanatory, man.
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
Randomize
