Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
I just woke up with a cowboy hat on my face and a playboy from the 90s on my chest
Randomize
