2:45a: Any chance you got 3000 bucks on you?
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
Dude, this old lady messaged me on Facebook talking about her grandson and wanted to know shit about me. I'd almost call her a cougar except she looks like mashed potatoes that have come alive.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
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