you turned your livingroom into a bong?
I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
You're earring is so big in my mouth
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
Randomize
