any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
I make one hell of a fire on Ambien. Other life choices not so much. But fire. Fire I can do.
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
He left a fire sauce packet from taco bell that said "promise you'll text me in the morning" on my nightstand.
Randomize
