I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
Randomize