just woke up and my boobs have "fun police" written on them
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
Randomize