They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
I'm just crazy horny about you
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
Randomize
