i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
Randomize