How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
New discovery: conditioner is better for jerking off than baby oil. Fuck yes.
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
Randomize
