just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
Randomize
