My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
Me: I shouldn't go to the airport bar it's too expensive and I don't need it. Dark me: SHOTS AT 7 AM
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
Randomize
