she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
This is my life. Enjoy the view
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
Sorry my phone died. Obviously four o'clock in the morning is a good time to tell you this.
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
Randomize
