Dude, I just rear-ended a cab
Are you drunk?
A little...yes
Run!
Terrible brother advice.
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm standing on the corner in a banana costume and cape with frozen bananas in my utility belt reassessing my life decisions.
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize